AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!

O-kay, people!

< rant >

What part of the "Microsoft Office and Research only" and "no games allowed in the Lab" signs don't you understand??? You're using a computer, so I know you can read. Or did you blank out, selectively, on that skill?

Oh, and how about that cell phone? How many times have I and my staff told you, personally, that we don't allow cell phones in the lab? Did you think the rules changed today? Just for you?

WELL, YOU'RE WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!

Use this equipment for what it's meant for, or get the **** out. The library is not your personal video arcade. You do not have a constitutional right to view the Yahoo! personals or visit an AOL chat room. And while you are sitting there, taking up one of the few computers in our building that actually have more than general internet access, people who might actually be wanting to use the library for the purpose it was designed for are wandering around, futilely trying to find a machine to access the library catalogue from.

And you know, I hate being the Dragon Lady, or That Bitch Librarian Who Kicks Us Off The Computers, or whatever it is the charter high school kids are calling me now behind my back. I really don't want to develop such an adversarial relationship with these students, and/or convince them that the library is not a good place to be. But, you know, sometimes I want to call the parents of these "little darlings," the men and women that are so proud of their children, who studiously spend 3 hours at the library after school each day, and tell them what the little pissants are actually up to.

Hint: it's not schoolwork.

< /rant >